Orthodox forgiveness grows from the mercy a person receives from God and gradually learns to share with others. It does not call evil good or remove the need for truth, justice, and boundaries; it frees the heart from having to live by revenge.
A person understands that they do not want to live with resentment, yet inwardly they return again and again to what happened. Sometimes those around them demand immediate forgiveness, as though it were a decision that could be made in a single motion. It is helpful to begin by making a distinction: forgiveness does not have to mean forgetting, restoring trust, or returning to unsafe relationships.
Sometimes, after a misfortune or a long-unanswered request, a person feels not only sadness but anger. It can be frightening: such feelings may seem incompatible with faith. But the first important distinction is that experiencing a feeling and choosing a destructive action are not the same thing.
When life changes in several areas at once, a person can lose their sense of stability. The future is unclear, familiar solutions no longer work, and there is less strength than there are tasks. Support does not necessarily come as a great feeling of confidence. Sometimes it begins when someone is there beside you and the next small step becomes clear.
